Da Maker of GREAT Mistakes

Uh oh, I can't think of a thing to write about, so I will have to talk about collectin' da dues! Dat's what I do, I collect dues. Because everyone owes dues. Yeah, even you! Whoever you are readin' dis, you owe dues. And you better pay. Right now! And de maker of great mistakes sittin' next to me - he owes more dues dan anyone! Runnin' around, usin' black terms, I'm 'bout to snatch him BALD-HEADED. He tinks he is street, but he's just a POSER!!! And I don't deal with posers on my streetz! He owes such major dues dat I ain't even gonna worry about collectin' your dues right now, butchoo better not forget 'em. Yeah, dat poser grew up with rednecks in the bumpkin town of la grange, and can't no redneck belong on da streets! I ain't tryin'a hear that, and I can safely say that no one else on my street is neither! I happen to know he likes to sit around watching "Naruto" all day, and I'm pretty sure - wait, let me check..... - oh yeah, I am 100% sure dat no white anime-loving cook like himself could possibly survive on the streets for one minute!! Ooooh it's a good ting for him dat he's got Malt-o-Meal over at his house, 'cause I woulda kilt him for sure if he didn't keep havin' me over to eat dat stuff, so that he could have less dues on his tab. Uh oh! Yeah! It's just really funny to me how he keeps making mistake after mistake after mistake over dere! I am gonna quit typin' now, and go see if I can correct some of dose mistakes, and get da dues that are owed me.